Joe Weebles and
wobbles and sometimes falls down.
My how do we start this one. This is one of the more painful
sections. Let's begin with a little more info about my college
roommate Joe. Joe is a sadistic person who loved to torture
bag boys at Old Woodson's. He is sort of careless and reckless
like the time Al was coming back from class. Joe jumps at Al
and they tumble down 3 flights of concrete stairs. Well during
our time in College Joe endured more physical damage than seems
humanly possible. One of our stories above 1,000 pounds on Joe
is one, but Let me recounts some of the other times for you.
One of the earliest accounts I can think of was when we started
Karate. Well, me and Joe had tested and were at our second level.
So we decided to start sparring. I could over hear one of the
black belts saying, "Gosh they know just enough to hurt
themselves." Well during our first couple of rounds Joe
was coming at me with a back hand, and I decided to come up
with a kick. Now a guy my size can deliver a kick with a lot
of force. As Joe was coming down, I actually kicked him so hard
I launched him back into the air. Well I hit him in the balls
and literally knocked them up into him. Most guys would have
laid on the ground and cried. Not Joe. He merely jumped up and
down a few times to shake them back out, and came back sparring.
The next incident involved sparring again. This time in the
hallway of our dorm. Me and Joe were doing a few rounds and
I came around and caught him with his guard down and delivered
a punishing blow to the head. Keep in mind we were wearing gloves
for our own protection. We didn't wear any head protection.
Joe's head bounces with a large crack into the bricks in the
hall. Joe is not even phased. The bricks were damaged but Joe
seemed as if nothing had happened. The next incident I was on
the phone and Joe was in the floor playing video games. Joe
hates being near my feet so I figure it's my obligation to touch
him with my feet whenever possible. I was putting my feet to
where they were almost touching Joe. So Joe slaps me in the
nuts. I like any normal person falls to the ground. I however
don't exactly fall to the ground. Joe's face intercepts the
better part of my weight. I come straight down on Joe smashing
his head to the floor. Well instead of knocking him out, he
squirms out from under me screaming, "Ahhhh get away from
me with your feet." The next and last incident for the
moment involved Mack Rains, or those who know him painfully
well Grot. Mack loved to pick Joe up and throw and wrestle Joe.
No, Joe did not love this in return. One day Grot had picked
Joe up and just started spinning him. Well Joe who is known
to bite, and do other vicious things decides to surprised Mack
and give him a kidney shot. Keep in Mind Joe is slung head first
over Mack's shoulder. When Joe does that Mack unintentionally
slams straight back from the shock of the blow. This in effect
like a pile driver drives Joe's head square into the tiled floor
as Mack's legs become pinned under him. Joe without a second
thought springs up like nothing happened while the tile where
his head slammed into was cracked beyond repair. I was standing
there witnessing thinking, "hmmm if Joe die's I should
get a 4.0." I truly don't know how Joe survived college
much less stayed intact.